from L.A. w/ ♥

Its on and off. I dont know if this break up will bring us closer or make us grow far apart. Ive gotten to the point where i don't even know what i want. I know that i want him, but there are things that he does and says that make me feel uneasy. Its gotten to the point where i can't distinguish between if I am happy without him, or happy with him.

I know that if i can't have him, i wont want anyone else for a really long time. I know i need to focus on my next 6-8 years in school. So if he really thinks that he's such a huge distraction, then God's plan will take its course and ill be left without a boyfriend, but on a positive note I'll be able to move forward with my education, and ill just have to wait for my next reall boyfriend till im 23-25...which is still a pretty good age.

Besides Michael, I'm just stuck in this cross roads with what I wanna do with my life. I know I most definitely am going for 2 degrees in science... Bachelor's and Masters... or Bachelor's and Ph.D... Bachelor's and D.V.M. ahhhhhhh! and I dont know if i want to be a Biology major still or if i wanna switch to Chemistry! i actually LOVE Chemistry... hmmmm...idk. we will see Ive got plenty of time to decide.